I went Bourne tonight.
A threat presented itself and I reacted accordingly. Then it turned out to be a 'joke' by my ex-girlfriend (of two days).
Earlier tonight I began receiving text messages from a number I did not recognize. The person claims to know me, and he is looking at me. Big deal, right? This isn't enough to get the Bourne in me going. However, things get a bit more interesting when he begins mentioning Sarah. It's the obvious, stupid immature "I know what you did and I'm gonna tell her." Wow, so this guy knows me a little—enough to namedrop. Couple quick connections and I've discovered the number is registered to a cellphone on the Verizon Wireless network and originates from Murfreesboro, Tennessee, which is around a 1000 miles away. Given the reference to Sarah I assume he is from Murfreesboro, but visiting my town, and is friends/relatives with someone who knows me.
He lightly says, "I've been watching you. I see you right now." Of course I scoff at this, "That's the weakest threat you've given yet. Careful, you're losing your edge." I scan the vehicles around me in the parking lot, and then for good measure I move from my location to another business (Wendy's). I am not followed in this. I wait. Obviously if this person did have eyes-on he would have mentioned something about my moving. I scan the cars around me now, none occupied and none of them from the previous parking lot. I begin to taunt the person. "Please, I've forgotten, where am I?" He replies, "If I told you where you were, then you'd know where I am." This is partially smart, but also partially stupid. It's filler. He has no idea where I am. He continues with the threats. He's been watching me, he's seen me do something with another girl, he's going to tell Sarah.
After a while his responses begin becoming fewer and farther between. I grow weary. I know he's nowhere, I know he's nothing. Being still hungry, and still too cautious to actually eat at Wendy's, I drive across town to McDonald's. By this point I've wrestled control of the conversation and am asserting my dominance of the situation. I send a message to him, something like, "The more you say the more I can tell how little you actually know." I go inside and order. Of course Bourne is in full swing. There were six workers in the back, my cashier's name was Melissa. Only three patrons were in the restaurant, a man in the corner (who got more than one look from me), and a woman and what I would guess to be her granddaughter. But that is irrelevant. I order my food, being sure to pay in cash, even though it means breaking a twenty.
Then the shit gets real. While walking to my car I receive the message, "That McDonald's good?"
Calmly I get in my car, start it, get in gear, and idle out of the parking lot. Immediately I notice a truck which has pulled onto the road behind me from a parking lot on the other side of the road. "I wouldn't know, I can't stand McDonald's food." I tell him, attempting to tear him down had he been guessing (but how could he possibly guess that?). At this point Zach has taken backburner. We approach an empty four-way stop and I turn my left blinker on. He does the same. However, after my stop I accelerate rather fast and go right instead. He does the same. This road happens to have quite a bit of hills on it and I utilize this by turning onto a road I know while he's behind me on the other side of a small hill. I've turned around in a yard there and am facing the road he's on, although there's a tree and a fence blocking his view of me. He turns down the road I'm on, and passes right by me, his lights illuminating the cabin of my car, not even noticing. Guess he wasn't following me after all.
However I still don't deem it smart to go home immediately. I begin driving in circles, while keeping communication with the man. This is when he starts to unravel and loses credibility, but I still can't get past the McDonald's sighting. "Why are you in such a hurry to go home?" he sneers. This kills me because 1) I'm actually going in 35 in a 55 at the moment, 2) I'm not headed home at all. I tell him that 'if' he has spotted me and is following me, then going home would be the dumbest thing I could possibly do. I continue my circling, varying my patterns. There hasn't been one reoccurring vehicle in miles. I finally deem it safe to bring my circling pattern closer to my home. He tells me I should be headed home, and that I should be scared.
But I'm not scared. Far from it. I'm alive, and breathing it all in.
When I reach my road I pass by my house without a second thought. Scanning the property, there's nothing out of place. I happen to live in between the endpoints of a circle road, so taking the next road looped me back around to the road right before my house. I take it, and pull in, and enter the car in stealth mode (this would be where I turn off all lights possible as close to simultaneously as I can; my car has a 'feature', as I call it, but it's actually a glitch, where if you pull the e-brake and put the ignition in AC it turns off every outside light). Quick scan, I sidle to the door. Everything is in place there, and enter the house.
At this point I'm feeling relatively safe. I go to my room, get online, all is well. Here I make a mistake: I get on MySpace. But at least I am aware of it at the time. I am at my computer screen in front of the window when I get the message, "What are you looking at on that computer?" I remember I laughed. Not sure why, but I did. I walk out of the room (and out of possible sight) and begin preparing things. I've located the ammunition, the doors are locked. Given if the person actually sees me he'd be in front of the house, I let my dog out the side door. Basically I sacrificed her. Minutes pass, no barking. Then: several low growls and frantic scratching on the door. Of course I'm not going to open the front door and let her in. Instead I turn off the porchlight.
I return to the computer and to a message on my phone that says, "Aww...why'd you leave?" It's at this point I realize the mistake. I realize another possibility. When you sign in to MySpace it shows you as 'Online' to everyone who cares to glance. Perhaps I'm not watched at all. Perhaps he sees my MySpace status and knows I'm on a computer somewhere. I bring up the list of my friends on MySpace who are online to get my list of suspects. None of them seem too likely. I overlook that my ex is listed among them.
But why the "why'd you leave" message? Thinking, I open another browser (Firefox) where I am not logged in and I go to my profile. I am not shown as online. I was gone so long with my preparations that MySpace listed me as offline. That's why he sent that message: he thought I had gotten off the computer, scared from his first message.
He sends more messages, all of them having no effect. They're telling me how I should be sore afraid, that he's watching me. I ask for specifics instead of his generics I'm growing tired of. I get this:
"Ur 18.ur a senoir at chipley high.u drive a crappy red grand am.ur fav place 2 it is apparently mc.d..and i've noticed u lyk 2 play piano"
Notice he got stupid all of a sudden. It's not the same person it used to be. Somehow he expects this to scare me. The McDonald's sighting and my MySpace profile would tell you all of that. Once he realizes that didn't scare me he gets silent. Tired of it, I send a simple message:
Gameover.
No response for a while, then: "GAMEOVER!"
The lead goes cold for a while. I settle in and watch a movie.
On a random note, I decide to check my computer for any instant messages, e-mails, etc. The duck (Adium) is bouncing and screaming Sarah's name. She's apologizing for the whole thing. Apparently her boss (who used to be my boss) told her she saw me with another girl in the parking lot of her work. Sarah's imagination went crazy and soon enough I'm basically having sex with this girl in the parking lot in plain view of everyone. Sarah apparently knew about this for a day or so but never asked me about it, even though everyone she talked to told her to just ask me.
But no. After a whole day of beating herself up over it, and getting mad at me, the girl, and everyone else, she apparently decided to play a little game. She gave my number to her Aunt's visiting stepson who started the whole thing. Then her Aunt got involved and eventually it grew into all of this. By chance Sarah saw me at McDonald's while her and her Aunt and family were stopped at the redlight there. It was then things took a morbid turn.
She's apologized many, many times and doesn't seem to understand why I don't think the whole thing is funny. She says it was just supposed to be a joke. Some joke.
Against King Leonidas. Now I like Jason Bourne, good character, smart, fast, deadly brilliant, but Leonidas is just all that is man.
I got my head but my head is unraveling
Can't keep control, can't keep track of where it's traveling.
I got my heart, but my heart is no good
You're the only one that's understood.
I come along but I don't know where you're taking me.
I shouldn't go but you're reaching back and shaking me.
Turn off the sun, pull the stars from the sky
The more I give to you the more I die.
And I want you.
You make me hard, when I'm all soft inside
I see the truth, when I'm all stupid eyed
The arrow goes straight to my heart
Without you everything just falls apart.
My blood wants to say hello to you
My feelings want to get inside of you
My soul is afraid to realize
Every little word is a lack of me
Without you everything falls apart.
Without you it's not as much fun to pick up the pieces.
This Christmas I got a 22" Widescreen HD monitor from Dell which is being driven by my MacBook at 1680x1050 resolution. It's really, really nice. It's a huge upgrade from the 13" screen on the MacBook itself that I had been using for a little over a year and a half. To go along with that I've gotten a new Apple keyboard (over-priced, but I'm a sucker for that aluminum look) and a Microsoft (!) Wireless Laser Mouse 5000. I've found that Microsoft's hardware (with the exception of the Zune) are actually pretty good quality.
I expect to get a MIDI to USB converter soon so I can plug my piano into this and begin recording at better quality. Currently I'm limited to live recording through microphones. This isn't terrible, but it gives me very little control in the computer. Recording straight MIDI gives me the note information which can be tweaked, changed, fed back out to the piano, or sheet music generated.
Lately I've switched into a content production mode, doing more production than development. I'm still helping Adam get MyChipola going, but I plan to switch to just producing content for it and other projects after we finish up initial development. I dunno, we'll see.
I figure I should. I've got lots of things to write about. Things happening in my life. Thoughts, plans, aspirations. You know, the usual stuff. I've found people actually like my stuff when I do write, I just don't for some reason.
Oh my God it's absolutely amazing, I can't believe I never switched before. It just seemed like so much hassle, but once you get used to it it's really awesome.
For some weird reason every time I try to go to the MySpace of my ex directly on MySpace it throws an error and won't let me go. Only on her profile does it do this. I guess MySpace is saving me from seeing pictures of her and her new guy.
Thanks, MySpace.
Because I always seem to forget to mute it before I shutdown if I know I'm going to go to the library later. Because of this when I turn it on it makes the Apple sound very loudly and everyone looks up at me with a death gaze..
Who do you think would win? Bourne kicks some serious ass. Bond is sloppy.
Where do you consider home? Is it the place you grew up; the place you're currently living? Why is it home?
Submitted by uncagedbird.I still live at home with my parents, so here. I haven't lived in this house my whole life, but I don't remember the other houses.
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Nine Inch Nails Updated: Sep 18, 2008
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Recent Comments
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MissJessica said:
The world works in the most mysterious ways. Why do you want to see pics of he anyway? That just... read more
on MySpace is protecting me -
MissJessica said:
I think if there is a set up for another movie... then there most likely will be. Movie makers tend... read more
on Oh My God -
zacharytamas said:
I'm reading the Supremacy book now. The books are completely different, but they're okay. Written back in the seventies and... read more
on Oh My God -
MissJessica said:
I still havent seen the bourne supremecy. But I saw a book in Walmart called the Bourne Demise. I suppose... read more
on Oh My God
I think Bourne is muh smarter. He could out do bond at anything, except owning the coolest cars.. but thats... read more
on Jason Bourne vs. James Bond. Who would win?